One of his friends mentioned Brisbane in october. Not even mentioned, I don't even know what it's about, but I assume he means going there. what if he goes and finds a better girl? what if he goes and doesn't want to come back? what if I lose him ? he's not even mine to lose. but what if I lose him ? I want to stop feeling so shitty. I want to be the one to leave, if anyone goes. I want to be the one to make the first decision.